day 1... let's see how this goes

ok so anyone who knows me knows i love my facebook.. but there is so much more i need to say or feel like sharing than can fit into my little status box the 500 times i update it during the day :) so here goes my try at a blog.. everyone else does it, so why not!

let's see... so if you are following this im guessing you know a little about me, so much has changed in the last year or so that you maybe fell behind but all and all, same Devin.

Today is St.Patty's day, yay! have some green beer or something, yuck. we all wore our green and had a fun day, I think Audrey had the best day though, they went on a leprechaun hunt at her school through the downtown area, she loved it, although they never found him they did find notes from him and he did leave some gold (chocolates) for her and her friend under their mats after nap time, as well as his shoes :) on the way home earlier she told me "mommy the stoplights are even ready for st.patricks day, see the lights are green!" soo cute Keegan just rolled his eyes of course.. we also went to the book fair today where we bought Pinkalicious, Purplelicious, some star wars book, and llama llama mad at mama, the last one was a fave for sure, we plan to get all the llama llama books :)

that was pretty much our day, Justin is working overtime.. so, sad but good :) Im so thankful for him, just when I wanted to give up on men forever he walked into my life.. well walked back in anyway.. allow me to explain Justin to you.. for those of you that care or are curious i guess, if you are reading this just to be in my business or judge me that's fine, it is my hope that you will look at my life with more understanding if you really know what is going on in it and stop just pretending you do.. that get's annoying to me, people who make judgments when they clearly have no earthly idea what they are talking about! so anywho, I met justin when i was little, im not sure how old i was, guessing somewhere between 1st and 3rd grade, we both lived and went to school in westville, he lived behind my cousin's Brian (cuzzin) tonya and sharon. he played with them all the time and I would join in when i was there which was usually everyday since their mom kept me before and after school while my mommy worked, i really don't remember him much from those years though, not as much as my cousin's do, he just told me he would get mad when i came over cause i took them away from him hahah that's me always the popular one ;) well he lived behind them and now his mommy lives in front of them, although they moved a year ago.. of course brian and tonya and sharon haven't lived there in a while, but anwyay, justin was also good friends with on of my good friends liz, that's how we met back up these days, we all hung out a few times, our "crew" we always had fun, the night before halloween i had picked up justin cause we were all going spook hunting.. and we have been together ever since, i really wasn't looking for a relationship then, after getting divorced i had dated a few guys but they all were idiots or to into themselves or annoying or wiered out by the fact that i had kids, i really can't say i dated all of them, more like talked to, no one worth keeping past a friendship, and that's fine, i made a lot of good friends there that i have had some good times with, but justin changed my life. we have been together since the day before halloween and 5 months later we are still going strong and haven't spent a day apart, nor would we want to. of course he get's on my nerves sometimes, and i know i make him crazy but we really are perfect, and in hopes that everyone in the world has a soul mate, i can say with no doubt in my mind that he is mine, we share the same views and interests want the same things out of life, and are happy doing the most random things, i really believe we just complete each other.. ok ok now let's hold on i know what you are thinking seriously they have been together for 5 months and she knows all this? well how long is the "right" time to think these things about someone? how long is the wait time to know you are meant to be with someone? a month? year? 10 years? everyone is different and like my grandparents who have been married 56 years in july yes i said MARRIED 56 YEARS when you know, you know, and we know.. everyone that spends 10 minutes around us knows the same thing, let's get to the most important part, his relationship with my kids amazes me.. they LOVE him. he's always been a friend to them and supportive of things they do, laughed when they are being silly and sad when he hears something that has hurt their feelings, they adore him and he loves them. i never thought i would meet anyone who is so good to them, you always hear stories of kids and how they hate who their mom or dad is with, now out of the other guys i talked to i never introduced them to any of them, there was no need to, i made the mistake of allowing them to be around a guy i was seeing before justin and yes that was a mistake, but he was a friend before he was anything else and they had already been around him.. so no its not like my kids have met all these different interests of mine or anything like that, just one before justin, and there won't be another. so maybe that answers some questions, or "concerns" lol obviously i would never do anything to hurt my kids, i have made some hard decisions, because i had to and yes i do think they were the right things to do, we are happier than we have ever been, no longer do my kids always ask why im crying or feel sad because of how things are going around them, we have happy days and they see there dad as much as he is able to see them since his accident and they are happy doing that too. as for their dad and myself, we are finally friends again, after months of fights and harsh words they are in the past, we can get along, and still have our good memories and try and forget the bad, and that's how it should be. i tried for the almost 7 years we were together, i tried, everyday, and so did he, we didn't just give up when things got tough cause trust me it would have been a looooooooooooong time ago if we had, but we both knew it was never going to work, and wish each other the best. it just always annoys me to hear judgments from other about how we didn't know how to be married or just gave up cause it was easy or blah blah blah, to that i could tell you off all day.. but i won't, why? because its in the past, and #1 you have no idea what you are talking about :) unless you live in someones life EVERY DAY and go through what they go through with each other EVERY DAY then really you have no idea. no room to comment, or anything, so why do it? maybe because you are unhappy with your own life and want to point out the struggles of someone else, never say someone didn't try in the marriage, cause i don't care who they are unless they got drunk in vegas and got married and called it off the next day i bet my life that they tried to make it work, and we did. yes all of that i would love to put in a facebook status lol but it just won't fit! well im tired now after catching you up on some details in my life.. i promise tomorrow won't be so much of a out pouring of my brain.. or it might be, who knows!